The Shelving of Superman


In 2006, I and millions like me were supremely disappointed with Bryan Singer’s contribution to a seemingly simple franchise: Superman Returns.  Many compared the experience to gang rape, and questioned Mr. Singer’s true intentions (The Gayification of Superman).  Myself, I thought he tried too hard to connect the film to the Christopher Reeve era, particularly Richard Donner’s Superman II.

But Elisabeth Rappe of Cinematical has a piece up about the way Hollywood has failed to return to that singular magic that Donner and Reeve captured, and why they need to revise the approach.  Everyone loves to throw around the word “reboot,” and for some franchises, it works.  But Superman is a pretty famous dude, and if an audience doesn’t know about Jor-El, Krypton, and the Kent farm, it’s really not all that bad.  They won’t be lost if we just jump into a Supes story in Metropolis, ratcheting up a plot that doesn’t have to explain Superman.  What’s not to get?  He can fly.  He’s strong.  Only Kryptonite can harm him.

Therein lies another problem that Elisabeth brings up.  He’s kind of a boring hero.  Even when Lex Luthor flattens him with a giant slab of the stuff, we know he’s going to be okay, somehow (although Singer’s solution reeked).  We know our protagonist is going to come out fine, and that hinders suspense.  However, if we have Superman performing to save someone else, say, the human race, then we have ourselves some real, interesting drama.

The reality is- Tinseltown is giving up for now.  The last Son of Krypton won’t be flying across movie screens anytime soon, because the potential for another failure is too great.  That’s really too bad, for I think it’s important to have more Superman in our lives… as long as he’s done right.  I suppose the only hope we have to believe a man can fly would be to combine him with another, more bankable hero.

In Need of 3-D



I barely missed Coraline in 3-D at theaters because that day the 3-D machine went to the theater showing a movie about these three brothers who sing songs to pre-teens. It was then I sensed a tremor in the Force.  And here we recently saw it’s not relegated to new movies, but old ones too, and boy what a great choice for this formula: Toy Story and Toy Story 2.  They were mildly successful with their so-far 13+ million dollar grab on a re-release.

Obviously, this needs to be done with better movies, and Popeater has a fine list of good candidates.  I especially like the concept of seeing The Wizard of Oz in 3-D.

They left off two I’d be keen on: The Empire Strikes Back and 2001: A Space Odyssey.

This one image is more interesting than a 2 hour Jonas Brothers concert.

This one image is more interesting than a 2 hour Jonas Brothers concert.

Remakes Rule The Box Office


Some movies from the past could use an update, a polishing here, a plot kink there.  Some fine tuning would work to improve on them.  This is not the case 99% of the time.  This is because 99% of the movies worth remaking (i.e. getting asses in the seats to see them) were already good movies in the first place, and still succeed in entertaining new audiences on Blu-Ray today.  One title, however, seems to fall in the 1% of necessary re-tooling, and it opens next year.


That’s Terminator Salvation‘s Sam Worthington as Perseus in the 2010 remake of Clash of the Titans. And as much as I adored the original for it’s groovy special effects, I could go for a new version, one that’s maybe a little easier to follow, plotwise.  The effects are sure to be excellent, anyway, and lookie here- Liam Neeson plays Zeus, and Ralph Fiennes, Hades.  Winner-potential.

Another project supposedly being hammered out is a live version of Akira, which I think could be fantastic.  And thankfully some remakes I’d heard about are either dead rumors, or failed starts, like The Last Starfighter, The Evil Dead, Conan the Barbarian, and The Breakfast Club.

However, I must frown on the imDb confirmed “in production” crap-fests awaiting us.  In 2010, look out for The Thing (a remake of one of the best remakes in history), & The Birds (No!!).  2011 looms with Escape From New York, and Westworld, while they plan to spit in the face of classic cinema in 2012 with The Dirty Dozen.

It’s really a tired (yet true) idiom of Hollywood running out of ideas faster than the speed of light.  I’m still reeling over the new Nightmare on Elm Street camp.  And I actually wouldn’t mind a remake of some old movies that could use a tune-up.  Farenheit 451 comes to mind, but then again, so does Speed Racer.

The Prisoner


I’m all kinds of excited and hopeful about the remake of The Prisoner.  That British series was my official favorite TV show of all time for a few years, until I burned out on it.  A fresh remake is all I need.  And it doesn’t hurt to have Ian McKellan as Number 2, not to mention Jim (Jesus) Caviezel as Number 6.  The fact that AMC is producing it is just icing.

Check out their site.

I can still recite the intro from memory.  Patrick McGoohan was never so Present.  Here’s the ridiculously long, yet awesome intro to the original.  Something I never fast-forwarded through on any episode. 


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